Females seeking Females...

It’s for More than just Sex
Submitted by: Tura

Find your Caribbean Love or Sweetheart in the Bahamas Personals

Females seeking Females

Maybe the porn industry is to blame - with its ‘hot girl on girl action’ craze. Or maybe it’s media sensationalism over Madonna’s on stage tongue-tagging of Britney and Christina. Whatever the reason, mainstream society views lesbianism as no more than one big hot steamy lust-fest involving sex-addicted females who are coo-coo for sex toys and orgies and lick and bite each other from sun up to sun down without so much as a lunch break to spare.

Now, before you get all excited and think that this is another article on lesbian exploitation, get your mind out of the freakin’ gutter! Believe it or not, it appears that many Bahamian women are seeking relationships with women for more than sexual reasons.

“Think about it, why do females usually have female best friends? That’s because there is something you can only ever share with a female. And there is a different bond that is created,” said Sexciflo, who emphasized that companionship, honesty, loyalty (the same qualities that heterosexuals seek after) are top prioprity for lesbians also.

For those who don't know, Sexciflo (or ‘Flo’ as she is called in the chatroom), is bisexual. At age 16, she realized that she was “equally attracted” to males and females. She’s has been in relationships with women, but for the past 3 years she’s been with a man - though she admits that at the beginning of the relationship she was still dating women on the side.

Flo believes that there is a stronger bond forged when bisexual women come together since they are abnormal in society’s eyes, but really find a degree of normality in each other. After all, they understand those feminine tendencies like mood swings, emotional stress, periods - all the things that men either don’t understand or just don’t want to hear about.

Skittles (also known as Dotz and Skitz in the chatroom), is also bisexual. Curious for 3 years, she had her very first lesbian experience about a year and half ago. And contrary to what many people believe about lesbians, it wasn’t some bad experience with a stupid or ridiculous man that caused this change in Skitz’ life. It was really the result of her own curiousity and attraction to other females.

While she doesn’t think that bisexuality is necessarily a growing trend in the Bahamas, she does know women who have relationships with women simply because others are doing it.

But claiming to be bisexual or even a lesbian for that matter, simply because you’re into experimenting, seeing what the hype is all about, or if you feel a woman can do certain sex acts better than a man, may not be the best reason. According to the popular lingo, that means you’re just “curious” and can switch back to men exclusively at any given moment.

“...I personally don't believe you can just switch back and forth if it's something real and you really feel that's the way you are,” she said. So that means that a bisexual female, though dating a male can still find herself attracted to females. It’s not like she shuts off that part of her.

While Flo and Skitz - and MANY other women logged on to Bahamiansonline - are bisexuals, LuvHer (aka eNvY mE, Nammy), who is also a frequent Bahamiansonline chatter is a full-fledged lesbian.

“I’m 100 per cent lesbian. What that mean is that I’m fully attracted only to women emotionally, mentally, physically,” she explained. “I don’t date, sleep or flirt with men. I don’t have a problem wit men, I jus don’t want to date them.”

By attitude and appearance, LuvHer is what you might call a “soft butch”. She’s been dating females since age 16, but had her first lesbian experience at age 13.

Since Bahamian society still doesn’t accept this lifestyle Nammy found herself adopting a boyfriend simply for appearance sake, though she was never really “content” in any of those heterosexual relationships.

But these days, she’s totally liberated and has completely embraced her sexuality with the mantra that she only has one life to live and she’s gonna live it for her, not giving a “shit” what anyone else thinks.

With all the negative feedback and backlash that lesbians and bisexuals get these days, I agree with Nammy when she say’s that “no one in their right mind” would choose to be a homosexual. But she says that a lot of women can’t help it because frankly, that is who they are.

And about this apparent trend of women becoming gay, Nammy believes that they’re not “turning gay” per se. It’s just easier for them to be open about their sexuality now.

“Nobody just wakes up one morning, rolls over and says, ‘hey I’m going to eat some pooci today’. That had to be something she was planning or a way she felt for a long time and was just looking to blame someone. It’s just easier to blame someone else,” she said.

* Whether you’re a lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual, what are your views on homosexuality? Don’t be afraid to give a comment and let others know what’s on your mind.

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